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Revolution Pro review - July 19th, 2003
By Manila Ice

Gee golly gosh darn! My first report! Here it goes ... Rev Pro 7-19-03 ...

There was a lot of traffic on the way to Rev Pro. My crew and I got there at 2:00 thinking we were on time, but my homeboy Street Style and Top Gun Talwar were already in the ring. An indy show actually started on time! Street Style and Top Gun seemed shock as the Gallineros were announced as their opponents. They began the match immediately ambushing the Gallineros as soon as they stepped through the curtain. After a lot of thrashing through the chairs, some kid yelled, "Get in the ring!" Eventually they did. At one point, Talwar seemed to injure himself outside. Shady picked up the win with what he calls the "Blue Eyes White Dragon" suplex pin.

In the second match for the tag tournament, El Caliente (Angel and Mr. Excitement) faced Black Metal and Zokre. We saw a different side of Black Metal as he casually walked out wearing a slick hat and biting a cigar. This match had a lot of great action. Angel pinned Zokre. Afterward, Angel picked up the mic. He suggested to Mr. Excitement that they be more than just a tag team. A "Just say yes" chant broke out. Mr. Excitement declined mentioning, "I like you as my partner, but not as my 'partner'."

In the third match for the tournament, we saw Mexico's Most Wanted (Halloween and Damien 666) take on King Faviano and the Durango Kid. Favi always puts on some great comedy and that Durango Kid is really light on his feet. Nice agility. There was a bit of fancy chain wrestling. Mexico's Most Wanted won with a nice double team submission.

"Hey you, what's that sound?" That sound was the team of Disco Machine and Chris Bosh taking on the Aerial Express (Scorpio Sky and Quicksilver). Disco and Bosh came out wearing matching masks. Bosh's shirt read "Boshamania" and he threw it to a guy in the audience known as Mini Taro (who had a striking resemblance to that Joey Ryan fan). Quicksilver managed to slip in his signature submission. A "Disco" chant broke out here and there. Disco and Bosh worked well as a team, but the Aerial Express scored the pinfall to advance in the tournament.

Finally, there was a break from the tournament and we were given a singles match between Extreme Loco and El Mongol. Extreme Loco has one of the best entrance songs. This match got the second biggest pop. "Mongol" chants were breaking out everywhere. He was over. It must have been the new ring atire. The dude next to me (shout out to my dawg, Shinigami) labelled Mongol as "the new Taz, the new human-suplex machine." Mongol won with the victory roll.

In the first semi-final for the tag tournament, Damien and Halloween entered the ring. Their opponents were the Street Style from 8 Mile and the Dangerzone Top Gun Talwar. Too bad they came out to a different theme song rather than the usual "Lose Yourself" by Eminem. Shady came up to me and as a sign of true gangsters, we both executed the double C-Walk to a descent pop. Mexico's Most Wanted took exception to our dancing. Top Gun didn't seem like his roid rage self most likely because of the injury earlier. Black Metal and Zokre came out and offered to replace him. So which member of Los Sanchos would it be? "Wild Thing" blared on the speakers and it was American Wild Child. Throughout the match, MMW punked me out in Spanish, gave me the old DX crotch-shops, and immitated with their own C-Walk. I tried to flash them a peace sign, but due to premature arthiritis my index finger wouldn't go up and my middle finger was stuck. MMW were kool with it and laughed it off. Shady shut them up with his signature C-Walk into a right hand -- shades of "Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo" (1986). AWC locked one of them in a submission and, in honor of the annual B-Boy Summit this weekend, Shady busted out the 1990 into a leg drop. With Damien in the corner, Halloween got caught in a drop toe hold and fell face first into Damien's crotch. AWC repeatedly bounced Halloween's head into it and I was the only one chanting, "Damien likes it!" On the outside, AWC held one of MMW and Shady went for the Asai Moonsault. Excellent hang time ... unfortunately, the dude broke free and Shady nailed AWC. I missed the finish as I was blinded by the glare off Damien's bald spot, but when I regained my sight it seems that Damien had gotten Shady into the Mexican Stretch Bomb. I chanted at MMW, "You're washed up!" Damien smiled and punked me out one last time. In the ring, AWC congratulated Shady, the soon-to-be-father. Everyone gave him a round of applause.

In the second semi-final, El Caliente wrestled Aerial Express. Scorpio Sky handed the ring announcer a customized introduction. Mr. Excitement took it and joked, "The Orial Express." The real introduction read: "At a combined 19 inches of magic stick ... they are 2 scoops of vanila and chocolate with the nuts and they are ridiculously good looking ... Scorpio Sky, Quicksilver ... the Aerial Express!" If only their name didn't sound like a postal office. Aerial Express won with their tag team finisher. Scorpio Sky gets great height on his drop kicks by the way. Angel asked Excitement one more time for his decision. Excitement declined. Angel turned on him, beat him to the mat, talked some trash, and then left. The crowd chanted, "You got punked!" Excitement explained on the mic that even though his mom told him never to beat a girl, he will now have to make an exception. The crowd that he was facing chanted, "Shut the f*** up!" The other side answered with a "Watch your language" chant.

Now it was time for Super Dragon and Taro for the Jr. Heavyweight title. Super D had a happy-go-lucky entrance theme and he ran out in a seemingly great mood high-fiving everyone rather than flipping them off. Taro entered and spotted Mini Taro in the audience. Mini Taro got to push the button. The match began with a contest of sick chops. Then both stepped to the outside to continue chopping each other. Then they went back in the ring and wrestled. This match got the biggest pop. They were always countering and kicking out of each other's finishers. When Super D finally managed the Psycho Driver, Taro's body bounced to the outside and he was unable to capitalize. Later, Taro's nose was pouring blood after a loud thrashing into the chairs. Another memorable spot was Super D trying to Psycho Driver Taro from the second rope, but in mid-air Taro countered into a huracanrana. At one point, referee Steve ludicrously jumped high up in the air to make the 3-count. He got a "You got air" chant. Taro's mask nearly came off several times during the match. The finish was a frustrated Super D unleashing a fury of chops, punches, and kicks. Taro's comatose body couldn't kick out, but the kid put up one hell of a fight. Super D regained the Jr. Heavyweight strap.

A really hot lady carrying the new tag team belts accompanied the ring announcer to the ring. She got one of the biggest pops. At first the ring announcer thought it was for him. She showed the titles to the audience and it was time to start the main event. Aerial Express came out to a different theme song than the one they used in their first two matches. A couple of lost grandfathers wandered inside doing a little dance. Oh, I'm sorry, it was Mexico's Most Wanted. Within MMW's first few steps, Aerial Express double dived a nice distance and took them out. They should change their name to Aerial Assault. They cut through the air pretty clean. Surprisingly, this was a really short match. Who knows? Maybe bed time was approaching really fast at the old folks' home and MMW had to rush back. The finish was Damien putting Scorpio Sky in a giant swing and into a drop kick from Halloween. The locker room came out to congratulate them. Damien turned his attention toward me and smiled to gloat that he and Halloween were the new tag team champs. MMW smiled at me way too much and did too many crotch-chops. What are they insinuating? That was kind of making me nervous. My crew wanted to leave immediately so I missed any speeches that were made. Anyway, this was probably the best Rev Pro show I've been to.

Manila Ice
I'd rep 8 Mile, but my car broke down after 3